Suddenly “got” this:
We have to find the inner Lover, the inner Home, and become secure there before we attempt to establish those experiences externally. The external is meant to be a reflection of what’s going on, what’s real, inside. We err when we focus only on the external situations and see those things as the primary goal — the “answer” — to our questions, loneliness, etc. Those things will always be imperfect in some ways, so we can only bear them when our internal world is complete/whole and perfect for us (which is something only we can decide). Otherwise, we keep running and seeking externally, never understanding that what we seek exists inside.
Explore your inner world.
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Lisa, I totally agree. I see women everyday, of all ages, who are seeking meaning from their relationships with others, their jobs, academic studies, and their overall surroundings. I strive to empower these women to look inside themselves and explore who they are, not in relation to anyone or anything, as an individual. I encourage them to look inward and reflect upon how they are feeling on the inside…not easy to do…it takes time.
On a personal note, it wasn’t until after I turned 50 that I found the real me. I was always labeled by others, and myself, as mom, wife (now ex-wife), nurse-practitioner, friend…but those things only served to shape who I really am…who I am inside. Through quiet alone times, I have learned to be mindful of my thoughts and feelings about me…and through this self-exploration I have become a person who can fully participate in the world of others without allowing any of their potentially negative thoughts or actions interfere with me as a whole, perfect-for-me person.
Keep writing…I enjoy reading your blog.
By: 4healthywomen on August 25, 2016
at 9:20 am