Posted by: Jivani Lisa | September 25, 2013

I Can’t Stay Alive

“All the ends of the earth shall remember and turn to the Lord;
and all the families of the nations shall worship before him.
For dominion belongs to the Lord,
and he rules over the nations.
Yea, to him shall all the proud of the earth bow down,
before him shall bow all who go down to the dust,
and he who cannot keep himself alive.”

Psalm 22:27-29

While reading Father William Meninger’s commentary on Psalm 22 in his book, The Loving Search for God, I was startled by this phrase, “and he who cannot keep himself alive.” Wow. On the one hand, of course, no one can keep himself alive. We are all destined to die in the body; we are all incapable of avoiding sin (a kind of “death”) as well. Christians have reason for hope and joy, however, because Jesus has saved everyone through His death and resurrection.

This phrase, “and he who cannot keep himself alive,” has an even deeper meaning for me personally. Oh, the agony! Truth be told: As hard as I try, I cannot love life in this world. I do not wish to be in the world. Never have, even as a child. Often, it seems all I can do is survive day-to-day and struggle to avoid committing suicide. I am beginning to see this as a worthwhile battle, though, because the Lord is on my side. I bow down in praise of the Lord for creating me, saving me, calling me to do His work in the world, and sustaining me moment-to-moment. Without His strength and love, I know I cannot stay alive today or any other day.

There are other people in this world who fight this battle with me. We’re hidden. For the most part, we don’t speak of our trials because we know most people won’t understand. (That’s okay. The Lord understands – and that’s all that really matters.) We worship the same loving God along with those who are “proud” and those who are in “the dust.” In the end, all people – even those who consider themselves unbelievers – will bow down in worship of the same God.

I look forward to that day.


  1. Note: The reason I’d never noticed the phrase, “and he who cannot keep himself alive,” is because it’s not included in my Catholic Bible and Catholic prayer book (breviary). There’s a note in the Bible that says: “The Hebrew text is poorly preserved here. The translation given follows the revised Latin Psalter in restoring the text to accord with the ancient versions.”

    Wow, that’s too bad. I like this version a lot better. 🙂

  2. Lisa..I appreciate so much your honesty and genuineness. Your and Johns blog so often is used by God to speak to me. Blessings on you my sister.. Debbie

    Sent from my iPhone

    On Sep 25, 2013, at 3:28 PM, John and Lisa’s Blue Skies Blog – Soaring with

    • Thank you, Debbie! So nice to see you here on the blog. Hoping all is well with you. It seems like the world has changed so much since you and I had a chance to talk. Miss you!

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