During my prayer time, I intuitively saw God as a smiling Father who is continually giving us gifts – all kinds of objects, people, ideas, experiences, even life itself. Then He waits for us to hand them back, to surrender them into His loving hands. He wants us to relinquish them willingly – with a smile in response to His own smile. He wants to hear us say, “No thank you, Daddy, all I want is You.” When we do this, He says, “Okay.” Sometimes, He tests us by saying, “Are you sure?” Or He gives us other gifts to take the place of the ones we’ve handed over to Him. He wants to see if we will continue to say, “No thank you, Daddy, all I want is You.”
Well, I keep handing things back but I do so grudgingly, sometimes angrily, like a spoiled child. I can’t seem to play along. I’m too serious. Sometimes, I can play along when God gives me a gift and allows me to play with it for a while – or when He asks me to return it while simultaneously offering me another gift. The toughest part is when He asks me to relinquish gifts – or waits for me to do so on my own – without giving me anything else. My mind knows that He ALWAYS gives me Himself but my heart can’t always feel it. I still need to learn how to rest and be satisfied in the “nothingness” of God.
Dear Lord, please help me trust that you know what is best for me. You give good gifts – but the very best gift is Yourself. Teach me to surrender everything willingly to You, knowing that I am safe in your arms. Amen. Aum….